We suggest you turn to the Tao Teh Ching:
68 A skilful leader of troops is never oppressive with his military strength. The brave soldier is hardly very violent; The best fighter doesn't become visibly angry; he hardly loses his temper. A skilful conqueror doesn't compete with people. The great conqueror doesn't fight for small issues alone. The best user of men acts as though he were their inferior and puts himself below them by the virtue of not-competing. This is called the ability or capacity to use men, or matching heaven, or being suited to the highest found principle, [maybe of old] -- tr. T. Byrn